Today's post rounds out our exploration of children's developmental readiness for sports.
As I mentioned in my last post, children dont understand the process of competition until at least 4th grade. Similarly, the "team" concept doesn't begin to develop until children are between the ages of nine and 13. That's partly because preschoolers are egocentric -- which isn't a condemnation; it's just a stage of development. During the early years, children see the world as revolving around them.
Where sports are concerned, this egocentricity has two major implications. First, if children are going to be required to be part of a team, they're going to have to learn to cooperate with others. But putting them in game situations that oblige them to interact in ways they don't understand is not going to teach them cooperative skills. After all, they're being asked to pass the soccer ball to teammates, to throw the baseball to the first baseman, and to hand off the football to the running back. They don't want to relinquish these precious objects, and they have no idea why they're being asked to do so.
Second, the fact of self-centeredness means she takes everything personally, including words that are meant as constructive criticism. Young children don't separate what they do from who they are. So if a coach or parent is telling them they've executed a skill incorrectly, they may take it to mean they personally have done something wrong. A child under the age of eight will feel as though she's being criticized as a person, so you'll have to be careful to offer kindness along with the critiques.
Remember, too, that anything that confuses a child is also likely to scare him. Imagine, for example, how terrifying it would be if, with no training in the electronics profession, you were suddenly thrust into the role of computer repair person. (Having had my own computer crash earlier this week I have some recent experience with how frightening this whole arena can be!) Someone deposits an implement into your hands, and your technical team is rapidly relaying instructions to you, most of which consist of terms you've never heard before. Moreover, there are people on the perimenter of the room shouting additional instructions and encouragement, letting you know how much they're counting on you. At this point, it would be pretty strange if you weren't in a cold sweat. But as an adult, you would have the capacity to put a stop to it -- at the very least, to explain why you shouldn't be expected to do this. A child doesn't have that capacity.
Finally, if there's one common principle advocated by child develop speciasts and early childhood educators, it's that for young children, the importance of process far surpasses that of product. In art, that means the act of mixing and applying the colors teaches kids more than the "picture" that results. In early mathematics, stacking and restacking the blocks teaches vital lessons, whether or not a tower is created. In early science, planting seeds and watering them matters more than whose flower grows the biggest.
In sports -- or any physical activity, for that matter -- the process is in the playing. Children don't care about winning, nor about how well they're playing -- unless the important adults in their lives make it clear that they care about those things. What's important to children is that they have fun! They enjoy -- and learn from -- the doing and the social interaction involved in playing with others. For children, stopping in the middle of the field to chat with a friend counts more than scoring. There's more to be gained from the discovery of a garter snake -- and in sharing that discovery with teammates -- than there is from idly waiting for a ball to come your way. Counting the number of cars in a passing train teaches more -- and is much more immediate (children live fully in the present moment) -- than keeping score.
Unfortunately, there's no screening process to determine the readiness of young children for sports participation. Rather, programs are typically arranged by chronological age, a notoriously inefficient method of grouping children, as children develop at different times and different rates. Moreover, the physical, social/emotional, and cognitive domains rarely develop at the same pace. Therefore, a child who has the body size and possesses the physical skills to play may well lack the social skills to cooperate with teammates or the emotional skills to handle loss. Similarly, a child who demonstrates advanced social and emotional maturity may be physically uncoordinated, or lack the strength, body size, or practice and experience necessary to successfully execute the physical skills required.
When looking at your child with sports in mind, take into consideration his physical, emotional, and cognitive maturity; and ask:
- Is she coordinated?
- Is he as big as the other kids his age?
- Does she cooperate with others?
- Can he pay attention for minutes at a time?
- How well does she understand and follow directions?
- Has he expressed an interest in playing?
- And, once playing, does your child continue to have fun?